


Then it's the most beautiful lie ever told

by thereisalwaysanand



Series: Daybreak [2]
Category: Supernatiral
Genre: M/M, PSTD, beach, beginning of relationship, fluff?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-08
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-06-01 01:28:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6495439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thereisalwaysanand/pseuds/thereisalwaysanand
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the movie ends with the big kiss. But life continues long after the confessions and the romance is over. </p><p>Title from I don't wanna grow up by Bebe Rehxa</p>
            </blockquote>





	Then it's the most beautiful lie ever told

The thing about fairy tales was they never moved past happily ever after. When Dean and Cas kissed that first time in the light of the bunker, that is where the story would have ended. The fairytale ending. Dean had hoped he could live in that moment forever. He never thought he would get to kiss castiel, and never dared dream of what would come after. In his mind he assumed that if he got to kiss the Angel one of them would be at deaths door. That way, their story would end much in the way it began, unexpected and sparking at the seams. 

But life didn't work like that. It didn't end in a glow of happiness, but rather it continued long past the sparks had faded. Life for Dean and Cas kept going. They slept in the same bed every night, woke up to each every morning. But in the space inbetween, Cas had nightmares. Nightmares that made the room shake with the last of his grace, and woke Dean with blind panic. Dreams of lucifer's hands around deans neck, green eyes losing their sparkle, last breathe blowing into the void. 

For the man who had never been in a healthy ongoing relationship, was suddenly with someone with issues as deep seeded as his own. How can you cope with someone else's problems when you're dealing with the same thing? Dean watched Cas fade into depression and he swore he could feel the Mark burn on his arm. A phantom sensation, like the victim an amputation. Dean helped the only way he knew how, with silence and food and drinks. He fought the urge to run and just kept reaching for the Angels hand.

Cas stopped touching Dean. The brothers tipped toed around the bunker because any loud noise sent Cas into a crumpled mess on the floor. Fear was evident in his blue eyes, and it grew deeper every day. Dean felt the pull of his own depression when he reached for Cas and was met with rejection. 

He didn't understand what he had done wrong. It was the hunters way to blame himself. The double sided guilt pulled at the pair, until one night Cas pushed him out of their room and Dean cried to his brother. Sam shook his head, hair waving in the force, and gave Dean a sad smile. There are things that not even true love can fix. 

It wasn't fair. The angel who said yes to lucifer, and the righteous man who turned into a demon. Literal hell had brought them together. Couldn't they get past this? Why couldn't they share their pain? Why did life get to tear them apart. Dean spent weeks begging the universe to give Cas to him. Cas spent weeks wishing Dean would come back to their bed.

One night, Dean made a choice. He packed up Baby, each bag lifting a weight on his soul. Cas watched him, silent in his panic. Dean put the last box in the car. "Don't leave." Cas whispered. Dean jumped, not knowing Cas had been watching. "Wha- what?" He stuttered. "Don't leave me." Cas said, his eyes welling with the tears built up from the past year. Dean stared at him, shock and horror in his face. As Cas' tears started to fall, he snapped into action, rushing to hold the other man. Quickly he remembered that Cas didn't like to touch Dean these days, and pulled back, giving him space. But Cas gave his consent by lurching forward into deans chest, making the mans heart beat fast and a knot of love tighten in his stomach. Cautiously, He carded fingers through Cas' dark hair, and whispered gentle white noise into his ears. "Cas, I'm never leaving you." Dean said after a minute, when Cas had calmed enough to pull back from Dean. Cas sniffled. "But the car..." "Is for both of us. I wanted to surprise you. I guess I caught up in my thoughts. I'm sorry I made you feel..." Dean faded, grasping at empty words. "...Where are we going?" Cas asked, like it mattered. It didn't, of course. Cas would follow Dean anywhere. "You want to find out?" They drove and drove until there was no more road. Dean parked the impala in front of a little cottage, and coaxed Cas into taking off his shoes. Cas followed him down a path covers in sand, past sanddunes and down to the coast. The ocean lapped at the ground beneath Cas' feet, emptying out into the ends of the earth. Seagulls sang above him and  
Slowly he let the waves kiss his toes. The air smelled of salt and sweat and when he looked back to Dean, a smile painted his face. Dean looked at peace, wrapped up in the wind and sun. Slowly he took a few steps towards the man, and wrapped his fingers around deans hand. Dean's face betrayed nothing, but he squeezed Cas's hand. Dean knew that sometimes, the hardest part of getting normal again, is people making comments about how great it is. So even though Cas' hand in his made his heart feel like it could burst from happiness, he stayed silent. Too afraid to spook Cas into retreating again. 

"Whose home is that?" Cas asked, finally. 

"Ours. If you want it." Dean said. "An old friend of Bobby's lived here once. I'm sure it needs fixing up, but I'm pretty good with my hands." 

Cas felt his lips pull into a smirk. The sea air felt good on his skin. 

"Ours?" Cas questioned again. 

Dean looked him over, settling on his eyes. "Your eyes match the water." He whispered, the dopey smile still on his face. 

It was a new beginning. A house with Windows, and no dungeon. Where no one had died, or been brought back to life. The devil had never touched this place. Cas felt like he could breath again.

Someone told Dean that the sea could heal anything. Dean hadn't believed it then, but now, he swore it was a miracle.  
Slowly the fear left Cas' beautiful eyes. He started holding deans hand again. In the night, he even let Dean wrap his arms around him as the nightmares held his mind captive. But with time, the nightmaresleft too. Now Cas dreamt the ocean and sea glass, made smooth and beautiful by the tumbling waves. Dean, for his part, dreamt of Cas' gummy smile and crickly eyes. The mark finally stopped burning him. He stopped seeing black eyes in the mirror. Sometimes he even felt hope build in his heart.

Dean built their home from the Skelton of someone else's life, but that was okay. The house had seen happiness before them, and Dean felt like it rubbed off on them. He kept all the pictures he found of the old owners, thanking those people for giving him their life. In the evenings, when the sun painted colors in the sky, Dean watched the light play off Cas' face like art and wondered why he ever thought he could be happy without him. Sometimes he had to touch Cas, just to make sure he was real and solid and his. Even if things were hard, at the end of the day, their Fingers intertwined, and there would be sand in their toes, and the purest happiness Dean had ever felt, stayed settled, warm and bright in his heart. That was their fairytale. 


End file.
